The Jewish Dilemma: Pork at Half-Price

The Jews as a people are smarter and more influential than any other group on the face of the earth. A relatively small minority in many countries in the world, they routinely dominate the politics, finances, sciences and arts to a disproportionate degree than their numbers would lead a person to expect.

Confident enough in their religious beliefs that they don't seek converts nor try to shove their beliefs down other people's throats, the Jewish communities throughout the world regularly produce individuals who are leaders in whichever field they choose. Hell, a Jew starts his own religion and a billion malleable saps get in line to worship him.

The tiny nation of Israel probably produces more wealth than any country of its size and also boasts one of the toughest armies in the world. "But wait a minute," the mantra-like argument goes, "they have the might of the US behind them, of course the other countries in the middle-east are no match for them." Exactly. Who wouldn't want the support of the wealthiest and most powerful nation in the world? It is only a testament to the smarts of Israelis and Jews elsewhere that they have directed things toward a situation where that is the reality.

Many people feel that this results in a puppet-like government of the US, but in fact Israel succumbs much less to political pressure than most people think. Not only do they enjoy the financial backing of the US but routinely disregard the wishes of the White House and generally take the route they feel is most prudent for them as a nation.

Any talk about Jews being smarter and shrewder than others, surely leads the most moronic of individuals to point to the fact that they seemingly allowed themselves to be led to the slaughter in WWII. It doesn't matter how strong you are as a people, when you're outnumbered by almost insurmountable odds, there is only so much you can do. Because they are so strong, they inevitably have suffered persecution from a world that routinely takes out its frustration on minorities and is perplexed and frustrated by a stubborn and intractable minority like the Jews.

The years following WWII prove that Jews have certainly made the best of things. History from 1945 until now has so angered many people who enjoy their minorities weak and subservient, that it has created another mantra that is routinely spouted by those who enjoy having their thoughts prepackaged and prepared by other. The incredibly nonsensical but popular "you would think they had learned their lesson," in supposed reference to the situation that now exists in the middle-east highlighted against the events that occurred during the holocaust.

In fact Jews have learned their lesson, but not in the way that that comment implies. Listening to other people for thousands of years only got them killed. So now the Jews of Israel are taking the path that all other sanctimonious nations have taken whose histories are soaked in the blood of war and the struggle to survive and expand. To those who rail against what they see as the unfairness of the situation in Israel, get your own houses in order first. Pack your bags and walk into the fuckin' ocean if you are from the US, Canada or Australia, for you are living in a land stolen from Natives and have exacted a far greater toll on them than Israelis have on Palestinians. Although debatable, at least the Jews of Israel have a claim on the land that is Israel dating back thousands of years, while those who live in countries stolen from Natives have no claim whatsoever.

I don't propose that Jews are qualitatively different or better than other people are. The only reason that I can point to for their seemingly superior thinking, reasoning skills, success in business and overall accomplishments in life, is the religion of Judaism. While my knowledge of Judaism is superficial, I do know that an underlying theme of all its teachings is the power of knowledge and the importance of learning. Any Jewish youth who undergoes the rigours of a Talmudic education will have a brain that is programmed to successfully guide him through life. Like all societies or groups of people, even those who are born Jewish but are not strict adherents of the faith cannot help but to be influenced and shaped by the positive (and negative) aspects of that religion.

The title of this thread is an acknowledgment of the practical and survival skills that have helped Jews survive for so long in a world that has tried to destroy them. The Romans relegated Jews to being money counters; something that was considered a dirty and worthless occupation at the time. Jews obviously became skillful regarding business and all matters concerning money and turned this into an advantage. Their actions are what most people hold up as the way to succeed in life, but somehow the same tactics that are hailed as being shrewd when used by a gentile are seen as contemptible when a Jew demonstrates the same behaviour.

There is still time to join up. While Jews don't seek new members, it is not hard to find a rabbi who will help you to convert. However, perhaps in an effort to keep the riffraff out, there is a requirement that you will have to be circumcised and even if you already had your dick sliced at birth a symbolic cut is still necessary.

This is an appropriate time of the year to pay tribute to the Jews of the world, as a good portion of the rest of the planet are ready to celebrate the birth of the most famous Jew who ever lived. La Chaim!!

Dying to Make a Name for Yourself

The desire to elevate your own existence above the sweaty unwashed masses and make a name for yourself, is literally a compulsion for some people. Lacking a true talent or gift that allows a person to pursue a life as an artist, those who crave the spotlight will go to extreme lengths to be heard and recognized. A recent article from the Greenwich Village Denizen highlights this phenomenon:

Greenwich Village, New York City-

At the heart of New York's bohemian artists' enclave, Smerlie's coffee shop is the place where you will find many of the neighborhood's resident painters, musicians and writers. The majority of them can by no stretch be considered "working" artists, as most of them hold down day (actually mostly night) jobs as waiters, bartenders and the like.

One topic that is always on the lips of the locals who stop by for a cup of coffee and the latest gossip is who has "made it". Despite the myth that artists shun commercial appeal and the big payoff, the opposite seems to be true if a person were to judge from what they hear in a few hours of small talk at Smerlie's.

Everyone agrees that painters are the group of artists who seem to have the hardest row to hoe. Wide commercial appeal amongst musicians and writers is not rare; in fact, that is one of the true indicators of success for those individuals. For painters however, it is a much different and complex set of circumstances that determines whether they will ever gain any degree of fame. Any recognition that does come their way will be confined to a relatively small group of people. The names of most painters who are known and command top dollar within the narrow and esoteric world of art connoisseurs would elicit a look of puzzlement from the average person.

In the past twenty years there are countless tales of painters with questionable talent who have gone to extreme measures to break into this rarified world of successful artists and those who pay them the respect they feel they deserve. Some of the examples of those who have tried to gain acclaim are in fact individuals who simply tried to put one over on the patrons of modern art who have rightly or wrongly gained a reputation for their pretentious attitudes.

Two painting exhibitions come to mind, both of which were lauded at the time but later turned out to be hoaxes of sorts. Post modernistic paintings that revealed in one case to have been painted by a group of 5 years olds, and in the other by...elephants. These facts were never mentioned at the time of the exhibitions. After the truth had been announced and the laughter had died down in the non-art world population, the question had to be asked "Did the fact that these paintings were made by children and elephants change the opinion of those so called experts who had initially praised them?"

The silence from those critics and patrons seems to be proof of their embarrassment and the fact that in many cases, self appointed experts are so desperate to create an esoteric world where they are the only ones who "get it" that they have lost touch with reality.

The sometimes nonsensical and multi-layered comments about artwork offered up by the members of this strange cabal whose opinions seem to shape the trends and direction of painters and critics, leaves many wondering if they are the ones who are usually having a laugh at the expense of the rest of us.

Let's be clear about who we are referring to. Those wealthy individuals who pay top dollar for paintings, are major contributors to the top galleries and whose purchase of a painting from a rising star can ensure acceptance of that painter into the connoisseurs clique. There are many artists who see approval by these individuals as proof that they have made it, and have gone to bizarre lengths to receive this acceptance.

In 1982, a New York City artist named Ike Maven made the ultimate sacrifice in an attempt to achieve fame in the art world. Maven purchased a 10 ft. x 10 ft. canvas, dated and signed the untouched fabric, positioned himself on a chair ten feet away and blew the contents of his skull onto the virgin surface with a 12 gauge shotgun. Maven had left explicit instructions to ensure that his "point of death" painting would not be a wasted effort, in a ten page letter to his lover.

Within weeks, word had circulated amongst those in the know who are willing to pay top dollar for a unique piece of artwork. The piece sold and Maven had achieved his posthumous bit of fame albeit amongst those handful of purveyors. The whereabouts of the painting are still unknown, although the word is that the initial 10 x 10 canvas was far too generous a size for the amount of gray matter that was splattered forth.

****************

I've long wondered about those self appointed wackos and the crap that they hold up as modern art.

One of the many reasons that you will hear from expats as to why they have chosen Thailand as their new home is because human nature doesn't seem to have disguised itself as much as in other parts of the world. The multi-layered pretentiousness and bullshit that dominates life back home hasn't taken hold to such a degree.

Still, I was curious as to what type of art world crap there exists in the land of smiles. If it exists anywhere here, surely it will be in the gilt-edged cesspool known as Bangkok where the aforementioned western style outlook on life creeps a bit deeper every year.

My philosophy regarding art is basic; if it is visually appealing, I like it. The "story" surrounding the piece of work or the artist is meaningless to me until after I have been drawn in by the beauty of the work. Even then, the fact that the artist may have enjoyed fucking goats rarely changes the enjoyment I get from what he or she produced. Similarly, regarding music, I am rarely interested in the political view of the cunt that is singing the song and if I am, it doesn't change one way or another my opinion of the music. Artwork, music or literature that appears dubious on the surface must always rely on surrounding myths and hype if it is to achieve any kind of recognition.

Seeking to get some real insight into whether there are any counterparts in Thailand to those talentless wonders from back home who have to rely on gimmicks and publicity stunts to be heard, I checked out a private gallery in Siam square. I have walked by this gallery numerous times and thought that one of the paintings would look nice on a wall in my flat, but knowing the price tag was outside my means I always admired from a distance.

"The kind of people you are talking about, no doubt are lacking any real knowledge about art but use their money to become 'important' in a local scene. They pay for exhibitions, buy the paintings and enjoy the circus like atmosphere and the fact that they are part of it," the sexy young woman working at the small gallery advised me.

"Any specific examples in Thailand that you could tell me about?"

"Well....there are a number of what you might call Khun Yings (old rich Thai bitches) who have spent some years abroad and now have returned with their husbands, or often times alone, to live in Bangkok. Maybe they are convinced that the time they have spent living in Europe or the US has somehow given them a unique sense of sophistication (one look at the helmet like hairstyles most of these broads sport is proof that they have no right dabbling in anything to do with aesthetics).

Together with having too much time and money on their hands they take a young, usually male artist under there wing and become almost like a sponsor for them. It's about control and more often than not the old hag is probably getting her insides painted as well. So she supports this artist, pays for an exhibition of his work and feels as though she has discovered him. The fact that the work being produced is awful is never really considered. It's also surprising the number of people who heap praise on the old woman's protege and the circus like atmosphere increases."

The young woman at the gallery, whose name is Pookie, turns out to be friendly and offers me a snifter of brandy as we sit down. She warms up to discussing the absurdity of the pretentious wankers who look at absolute bullshit paintings with a stern and knowing look in their eyes.

"Through my connections I learned that one of these questionable young artists was producing a series of paintings in which he had used an inkpad and a dead cat, pressing the cat's arse onto the inkpad and then mashing the ink stained carcass onto the canvas. The ridiculous looking effect seemed to impress numerous wealthy individuals and his paintings are hanging in half a dozen apartments around Bangkok," she laughingly told me.

The paintings on the wall of the gallery I am in certainly couldn't be classified as "modern" in the sense that you don't have to "get it". Most of them just look nice. Without being able to provide anymore specific examples of the type of crap I'm looking for, the young woman gives me the names of a few Khun Yings that have been known to discover new artists. It actually sounds like not a bad gig. I've already planning my breakthrough piece....force a few plate loads of som tam down my throat, position a 10 x 10 canvas against the wall and spray paint the fucker from 15 feet....and voila, Som Tam Explosion!